I KILLED LUCY

I killed her

Lucy

I killed my granddad’s one true love

The one that made him smile all day

I killed his happiness

And I am cursed

Because there is none like her

I stare down at her lifeless remains now

A tear drops

He will kill me in return

My heart breaks

I am a murderer now

I will have this follow me forever

Granddad will be back in an hour

I look for words to say but nothing comes to mind

Why did I disturb her?

Why did I have to make her fall down the stairs?

A little jealousy has cost me my evening tales of the military

Jealousy had cost me the love of my grandfather

It had cost me the hot chocolate talks with my favorite person in the world

He will never look at me the same way

I will always remind him of Lucy

Of how it was all my fault that he lost her

He will hate me

Perhaps I should also fall down the stairs

Just so I can also die with her

I killed the one my granddad truly loved

Even Chica the cat did not get that kind of love from him

She was his lifelong partner

His ride or die

And in one swift swing

I had murdered her

I had destroyed granddad’s life

I had lost my favorite grandchild privileges

In the next forty seven minutes

Granddad will walk through that door

And have his heart broken

Because he will see Lucy

Lying there on the floor

With me standing over her

And he will despise me for this selfish act

He will hate me for what I have done

He loved her too much

The kind of love that cannot be replaced

Lucy was an old soul

Her caramel skin flowed for miles

She had a beauty about her that left many stunned

And I had killed her

I should call the police

Thirty two minutes

I can’t move

I look at my hands

Her blood on them

Twenty six

Granddad should be walking home now

Home to see Lucy, Chica and me

Only that he will find two of us alive

His number one lifeless on the floor

Seventeen minutes

My heartbeat fastens

No words can get me out of this

No amount of hugs can salvage her now

Lucy is gone

Nine minutes

Eight

Seven

I can’t breathe

I am stuck to the floor

I can’t move

Still standing over Lucy

I bend down and touch her head

Cold

I hear the gate open

And granddad’s voice

Jovial

He is singing one of his old songs from his band when he was younger

He sings of peace and prosperity in the country

An old independence song

I brace myself

He is right on time

Typical granddad

Couldn’t even give me two more minutes to compose myself

Not one second to come up with an acceptable tale of how beloved Lucy died

Another tear drops

He opens the door

“Pa’…it’s…it’s… I’m sorry”

He looks at me, confused

Then I see grief fill his face as he stares at my hands touching Lucy’s head

He stares at his true love

Lifeless

“Pa’… I didn’t mean to… it wasn’t my fault…”

He closes the door behind him

And walks up to me

I see him lift his walking cane

And I fear he wants to strike me with it

But he hangs it on the staircase railing

And puts his hands around me

I fear he wants to squeeze the life out of me

Kill me like I did his happiness

Like I did Lucy

His body starts to shake

He sobs on my shoulder

“Pa’… I’m so sorry”

He looks up at me

His eyes are bright

He has been…

Laughing?

“Sweetpea” he says

“It’s just a smoking pipe. I have hundreds of those”

I look at him

Shocked

“But it’s Lucy…you love her!”

“No Sweetpea. I love you. Not a silly old pipe that you broke”

He kisses me on the forehead

“Want some hot chocolate?’ he asks

“Yes please”

And I laugh at my own madness

It was just a stupid old smoking pipe

I dust the ashes from my hands

-Awuor M